About Monica
The Advocate Behind the Scenes
I’m Monica Oliver, a human services professional with over two decades of experience helping others navigate complex systems. Today, I am also a web development student and, more importantly, a survivor of a medical journey that nearly cost me my life, but ultimately helped me find my voice.
From Shadows to Advocacy
For over three years, I lived in the shadow of unexplained fatigue, persistent body aches, and a debilitating brain fog that never seemed to reflect in my “normal” blood work.
My concerns were repeatedly dismissed; first attributed to my weight, then categorized as mere stress. When I shared my history of ovarian cysts, those became the new justification for my decline. Throughout this time, I felt the heavy weight of medical gaslighting, the subtle, persistent suggestion that the problem resided in my head rather than my body.
Trusting My Intuition
After exhaustive labs and countless specialist visits, I was finally referred to a Gynecologic Oncologist over three hours away. He agreed to remove the cysts but offered a pivotal insight: he didn’t believe they were the root cause. He suspected I was actually navigating PCOS.
That moment was a turning point. It validated the intuition I had carried for years and sparked my mission to bridge the gap between clinical diagnosis and the lived experience of recovery. I was confident that after years of feeling “off” I was finally on the right track.
The Advocacy Awakening
The PCOS diagnosis was my first victory—proof that my intuition was right. It was the catalyst that pushed me to stop being a passive recipient of care and start becoming an active advocate for my own life.
While returning to school, I encountered new hurdles that led to another life-altering discovery: a late-adult diagnosis of ADHD. For the first time, the way my brain worked began to make sense. However, this clarity was immediately met with a physical crisis. For weeks, I pushed through migraines and severe nausea, trying to “manage” what I was told was stress.
Finally, I drove myself to the Emergency Room. The reality was staggering: a brain bleed that had shifted my brain an inch to the left, six aneurysms, and a pituitary abnormality.
A New Understanding
Surviving that crisis, coupled with the clarity of my ADHD diagnosis and the support of therapy, fundamentally shifted my perspective. It changed everything I understood about my body, my neurodivergence, and the systemic dismissal women face in the healthcare system.
I didn’t just survive a craniotomy; I survived a system that almost let me slip through the cracks. This experience is the heartbeat of The Informed Advocate.
Why I Built This Space
Today I am merging my two decades of human service experience with my new path in web development to create The Informed Advocate. I believe that:
- Intuition is a medical data point. If you feel something is wrong with your body, you’re probably right.
- Diagnosis is a Journey. Misdiagnosis is a detour, but not the end of the road.
- Advocacy is a skill. It can be learned, shared, and used to save lives.
Living in the Southern Tier of New York, I spend my time balancing my AAS studies at SUNY Broome, advocating for better women’s health outcomes and sharing my life with my close circle of friends.
Whether you are here because you are recovering for neurosurgery, navigating the complexities of PCOS and ADHD, or simply trying to find the words to make your doctor listen, you are not alone.